Friday, December 30, 2011

Breakin' Out

Hello My Friends!

How are we all doing? Did we survive the mayhem that is often the holidays?

We had Christmas dinner at our house, our tiny little cabin in the woods, for the first time ever.


And it was so much fun! We've used the excuse of a small house for so long, we hardly every have friends over. With the new year? That is going to change! I loved having friends and family here. It warmed my heart to no end.

And, speaking of heart... have you gotten into the rhythm of choosing your word for the year?

A word that emerges from your heart and sets the tone and your intentions for the coming 12 months?

Guess what mine is?

Wait, before I get into that, last year mine was Soar. And I felt like I indeed did SOAR! I let go of plans and goals and must do's and instead listened to my heart, flowed on the currents around me, trusted my intuition, and soared to new heights. With the added bonus of a brand new perspective (stirred from some deep place of remembering, ironically enough) to round out the year.

This year's word? It COULD have been last year's, but apparently it needs to be expanded this year. And I'm all for that.

It is LOVE.

Of course.

I have a feeling I'm going to LOVE this year. I just do!

And you know what else?

I feel like I'm reclaiming part of myself right now. A part of myself I didn't even realize was me.

The past dozen or so years I have been going in one direction, only to realize that I had left some of myself behind. So this year I will be focusing on integrating ALL of me into me. LOVING all of me.

Here's a sample ~


I put on my "fancy" clothes yesterday, for no other reason than it felt like something I wanted to do. It was so much fun! I had forgotten! You know what? I LOVE getting dressed up! Since I've moved to the country it's something I gave up, slipping on a pair of comfy jeans and calling it good. Or, in the day-to-day craziness of work, mom-hood, school schedules, etc. I just didn't have the energy to put into what I was wearing.

No more. This Chica is getting back into her fun fashionista clothes. Woot!!

Watch out 2012! It's gonna be a rockin' year!

SO glad to be doing this thing called Life with you all!

Love to you, and a happy FABULOUS new year as well!

Oh, and what's your word for 2012?
Share it with my, won't you?

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

No. 33

I have been given a gift.

One so unexpected.

So amazing.

A perspective.

Insight.

Reunion.

Love.

Actually, I started with Love.


I asked for clarity.


And was gifted with more than I could ever have imagined.


From here?

Deepening the journey for sure.

Sharing it with you here.

There is so much to share...

Saturday, December 17, 2011

Creativity

Hello Friends.
How's the holiday season treating you?
Are you gearing up for some serious Solstice releasing and celebrating?
Have you remembered to take some quiet time for yourself?
How does your creativity fare in this season of opposites ~ Xmas/Holiday Madness vs. Dark Time/Go-Within Time of the year?

Over the past few weeks I've been painting here and there, it's slowed a bit, but creativity is being expressed. Quiet time is being taken. Even if just in little bits and pieces here and there.
Thank goodness.

Here's the latest...





They are all related somehow. How has not been revealed, but related they feel.

Deep work going on over here. Deep.

Deep.

Did I mention deep?

Very.

It's time.

Watch out 2012!

Grin.

Tell me your creativity stories, how's it going? Or your holiday ones. Or non-holiday ones.

Any story will do.

How are you?

Sending LOVE out to the stratosphere.

Choosing LOVE.

Happy Holidays.

Sunday, December 11, 2011

Choosing Love

Love Devotion
Studio Margot

I am so very honored and blessed to be sharing the Love today.

Please come and visit Studio Margot. Where the The Love Gift Series is taking place.

I am amidst some truly gorgeous souls talking about Love.

Thank you, Margot!!!

Choosing Love.



Monday, November 28, 2011

The 43 Paintings Progress

You might remember that back in March I set out on a little personal challenge.



I decided that in honor of my 43rd birthday I would complete 43 paintings!


It's been quite a year so far. And I'm not as far along as I thought I'd be. But I'm having loads of fun along the way! Not to mention the persoal insights and painting skills I've been learning.



So far I've done 30 paintings. (check that, 29 paintings and one mixed media "altar")


(You can see the whole trail over here.)



I may or may not finish all 43 by December 31st, but really? That's ok. It's not the point anymore. The idea was to get me painting. And painting I have been doing!



There have been paintings that I like. And some that are ok. And some I am not happy with at all. AT ALL. But that's okay. I may actually keep going on them, or just paint over them and start over. Who knows! There's a lot of freedom in that by the way. Not worrying about the outcome. But having a fabulous time in the process. I can't recommend that enough!



However. Sometimes a painting comes along that takes me completely by surprise. The process may drag at times, or be totally fulfilling taking me away from everything around me, sending me off into a time warp of some kind. AND, miracles of all miracles, the final product ending up being something I just LOVE.



Well, to be honest, there aren't that many of those. But this one? It's one of those times.





Gateway to Dreamtime, 11/27/11, #30 of 43


So in LOVE with this painting. The process had its up and downs. But suddenly, towards the end, it just all came together in this magnificent glorious ending.



There is so much meaning for me in this piece. In what it represents. A place. Real. And yet unreal. A shamanic gateway into other realms. Pure magic.



Sigh.



This creative life?



I am SO in LOVE with it.



Just had to share that with you.



I feel so FULL of creativity these days!



May you give yourself the time to tap into your creative well. And keep at it...



Juiciness awaits!




Saturday, November 26, 2011

Dreaming a Big Dream

Dreaming a big dream over here...


My art studio.

Yep.

I am declaring it ~ It's time!

A room of my own.

This fall and winter?

The gathering of the parts.

We have one window so far!

Come spring... my studio will be in the building stages.

By summer?

Oh yah!
Creating like crazy from The Studio on Juniper Court.

Just so you know.

Declaring it here.

Thanks for affirming it right along with me.

Dreaming Big Baby.

The only way to dream!

What about you?
What big dreams are you putting out to the universe these days?

Share here please!

Let's dream a whole new world while we're at it, shall we?

See you in the dreamtime.

Friday, November 18, 2011

What Makes You Come ALIVE?


"All I really want to do is share what makes me come alive."

Super spectacular words of wisdom from Connie at Dirty Footprints Studio. And she got me pondering this... wanting to share her words, and to share my feelings on this too.

Sharing what make us come ALIVE, that's what I want to do too. Many of us do.

When you are most alive, doing what you love, of course you want to share that with others. You want others to experience it too. It's an amazing feeling! We all need to have that feeling.
Being ALIVE!

But I've seen it get so twisted up in online-land and bloglandia. It becomes then a way to make money. To earn a living. Sharing what makes someone come alive is tied to a bottom line. Marketing. A product.

It starts to feel like we are being sold something that has been masked as "complete self-realization and a fabulous income to boot." That making money is also the goal.

This is an important distinction.

Because what starts to take over is that making money becomes the goal. Or, making a LOT of money becomes the goal.

And I KNOW people, I KNOW. We haven't evolved yet out of the market economy and folks still need to pay for housing and food. I get that. I do.

But ....

Why does it make me squirm? Why does it leave a bad taste in my mouth?

I guess I am ready for a shift. I see shift happening. And I am SO grateful for this.

But I want a BIGGER shift. Yes, I am an idealist, dammit.

And how are we going to get this shift if is all we see are well-intentioned folks setting the example of striving for money and material stuff rather than setting LIVING LIFE OUT LOUD and feeling ALIVE as the goal?

This is NOT a judgment against anyone. It's not.

But look around at the mess the US economy is in. Look at the mess this country is in.
Striving for money isn't working.

It's time for something new.

What makes you come ALIVE? Are you pursuing that?

I believe so completely in this.

I know we can do it. I FEEL it, it's coming. Let's hurry it along a bit, shall we?

It's time.

What makes YOU come alive? Won't you share it with all of us here?
Let's inspire each other!

Questioning the status quo and living out loud. It's what I do. Grin.

Happy Friday to you!

Friday, November 4, 2011

Life

This time every year is the crazy busy time of year. No matter how hard I try to keep the scheduling of things to a minimum, there's just no getting around it. Halloween, birthdays, festivals, parties... and we haven't even gotten close to Thanksgiving and Christmas yet.

Also, an added bonus for this year, my place of work moved to a new location, but for 3 weeks the phones and internet have not been hooked up yet. Can you say Chaos? OMG.

There has also been some major processing of "stuff" since returning from Sedona. Nothing has changed. But everything is different. A shift did occur, perhaps at a cellular level. And to ignore it invites more chaos. So there are several areas of my life that need, well, fine tuning, shall we say. Some are easy fixes. Others, deep, deep shit to wade through. Treading water upside down while juggling bowling balls sounds easy, in comparison. Just to give you an idea.

So with all of this, I haven't been painting much. Yet, I have been celebrating some AWESOME milestones with my paintings and my creative life!

Grateful for it all.

Here is a sneak into some of the deliciousness that is my life at the moment.


Our new go to breakfast spread.
The official spread of Joy Warriors everywhere.


The season ~ Halloween, Samhain and Dia de Los Muertos.

Going to the All Hallow's Faire ~ getting into the spirit of it by donning costumes.

My love, Dave.

My son, evil sorcerer.

Me, giving "burning at the stake" a whole new meaning. Ahem.


Friends who know how to party!


And friends that know how to dress for the occasion.


Love this kind of family bonding.



Quality time with a Sister. Muy importante!


My Love's birthday.


Celebrations abound!


Oh, and, by the way, my art now hanging here, at our new local cafe!


And, this one, in a collaborative art show.
(thought I had a picture of the event, but no idea where it went to)


Life.

Chaos optional? Sometimes.

But despite it all, excellent.

Indeed.

Thursday, October 27, 2011

Gratitude


There is something VERY exciting about seeing frames on one's art.

(clockwise, from top left ~ Cosmic Egg, Dia de Los Muertos Dos,
Cosmic Yoni, Dia de Los Muertos Uno)

Very exciting.

Even if it's just sitting on the kitchen table.

Lots of great art happenings going on over here.

Two pieces in a local collective art show.

Three pieces at a local cafe.

It's been a wild crazy ride, October has.

But somehow, the goodness is shining through, loud and clear.

Loving this creative life, so so much!

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

On Being Liked

What does it look like to live a life trying to always be liked?

Well, it starts first and foremost with usually not saying what's actually on your mind.
It means stuffing how you're really feeling.
And putting others' needs before your own.
Not wanting anyone to get upset.
To express disapproval.
Or to yell.

Can you say exhausting?

Yep.

I'm done.

I am so done.

I have spent the greater part of my waking life seeking approval.

Which means not ruffling feathers.
Agreeing when I don't.
Finding a neutral response that doesn't begin to plumb the depth of my feelings.

If I keep this up much longer?

Illness. Sickness. Dis-ease.

No thank you.

So what does this look like?

We'll see, won't we?

A bit new for me, that's for sure.

But it means I will learn to sit quietly when someone feels uncomfortable with what I have to say. Instead of soothing it over and or somehow minimizing what I just said so THEY will feel better.

It means I will speak even when my voice shakes. (thank you Eleanor Roosevelt for that one)

Sometimes people will be angry at me. They might even raise their voice. Or yell.

The worst for me though? Is that they will disapprove of me.

Disapprove.

This word.

With Disappoint a close second.

It holds so much power over me for some reason.

Seeking approval.

Enough already!

I may stumble along the way.

Perhaps I will mumble too.

But I know this ~

I cannot spend another minute of my life continuing this debilitating habit of always trying to be liked.

I need now, from this moment on, and for the rest of my life, to not care if you like me.

Don't think for a second that this doesn't scare the b'jeezus out of me.

But I am saying it here. Because I must.

Because my life depends on it.

Choosing love, still.

And always.

That has not changed.

Sunday, October 9, 2011

Sharing the LIGHT!

There is the most beautiful Soul that you need to know about.

Her light shines so brightly.

Her energy is boundless.

Her smile warms you down to the tips of your toes.

Her name is Charlie.

And she is spreading her wings far and wide and launching herself into the world.

You MUST go visit her.


You will be so glad you did!

The longings in your heart are compelling you - The time has come to cast aside fear, becoming all you feel you are because it is the only way to be comfortable in your skin. You are ready to wake up to all your Life has to offer ... to align the life you are living ... with the Life you were born to live. Charlie Shamsi Pettus



Saturday, October 8, 2011

Sedona on My Mind

Would you just look at that Orb?

photo by the uber fantastic capture-er of magic, Lis Hofmann

Apparently I was being held by the sweet lovin' arms of Sedona.

Which is a good thing.

Because Sedona revealed for me a series of moments that has forever changed the way I see myself, and my life.

I look at that photo, and I am amazed at the strength of the person I see there.

That strength surprised me.

But you know what?

I do believe it's time to claim this strength.

Time to be this person, through and through.

Even amidst painful realizations and yucky thoughts.

Especially now.

Sedona took me in her arms and promised to hold the pain of this revealing for me.

She let me know I was safe.

That I could leave it there, with her, to transform it as needed.

I didn't need to drag it all the way back to California with me.

I could experience it all. And be okay.

More than just okay.

I could leave knowing, really deeply knowing,
that every little thing,
is gonna be all right.


Art holds magical powers. Art saves. Art heals.

~~~

And this group of women?

I have mentioned them before. And will again, and again, and again.

photo by the super awesome Hansel Solera

They held me too.

And still are.

My Fearless Sisters, you are in very a special place in my heart.

Choosing strength, choosing love.

Wednesday, October 5, 2011


Sisters.

There is something so magical.

I am still in this deep, deep pondering space.

Sedona cracked me wide open.

Much was revealed.

Joy.

Pain.

Hope.

Love.

Above all else, Love.

For now, this is what I can share. More will come. But for now, this.

Love.

Saturday, September 24, 2011

Giving Love

Remember these?


They were the first part of the Love Revolution.

And finally, a little delayed due to a busy summer, but finally, the next part is here!

Love is being given again, this time in the way of these:


Little tokens of Love being sent for each heart necklace bought.

For each little heart hanging out at Twiga.



(and a few extra for good measure)


Love over and over and over. Again and again.

Never stopping.

Thank you to each of you that sent your Love, that bought a necklace, that contributed in some way, in any way.

Let's keep this Love Revolution going!

Choose Love.


PS. Necklaces still available, just send me a message!

Donations directly to Twiga gladly accepted! Go here.

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

I Believe


...every once in a while, someone will tell you their truest story–their secret–and if you have the strength and courage to hold it in complete stillness, you will find your heart expanding into a kind of love you have never known possible. Jen Lemen


I believe in life.
I believe in death.
I believe in life after death.
I believe in Spirit.

I believe there is much more here in this world than meets the eye.

I believe we are Souls on a mission.

I believe that each and every one of us has stories to reveal, gifts to share, discoveries to be made.

I believe we are not alone. In our despair, in our longings, in our hope.

I believe in miracles.

I believe that this world, this place we call home, is only one of the thousands of stomping grounds in the universe, but it's a crucial one at this point in time.

I believe Mother Earth is a living, sentient being evolving right along with us on this crazy journey called life.

I believe that we all have layers upon layers of forgetting. Forgetting who we are, what our gifts are, why we are here. But that those layers, as they are peeled away, reveal the most magnificent kernel of love and truth there ever was.

I believe that everything happens for a reason. Reasons we may not understand.

I believe in angels, aliens, ghosts, Jesus, Buddha, Mohammed, God, Goddess, White Buffalo Calf Woman, Spirit, Divinity.

I believe all of them are within us, are us.

I believe in a great divine Mystery that created all of this, and to understand that Mystery, to dissect it, figure it out, name it, to claim it as belonging to one group over another, or to truly know it, is not the point.

I believe in creativity. That we are creations of this Mystery, and we are here to create.

No matter what we create, labeling it good or bad also misses the point.
When we are creating, we are in tune with that great Mystery.
We are divinity.

It is not outside of us.

It is every cell of our body. Every star in the sky. Every emotion, thought or idea that ever was.

Time is also just one of these creations. No more, no less.

There is so much freedom in that. And responsibility.

I believe that deep down we know all of this.
And that our challenge is to remember it.

To peel away those layers.

To reveal the beauty within.

To reveal Love.

At the heart of all this, is Love.

I believe in Love.