Wednesday, September 14, 2011

The Reluctant Leader

I am a 22 life path and I am in a double 2 month.
It's been a doozy of a month so far, and we're not even half-way through it yet.

Oh goodness Tracy, er, Indigo, NOW what are you talking about?

Numerology baby. That's what I'm talking about.

Everyone has heard of astrology, which is based on how the stars were aligned when you were born and is also used to look at the energies of any given day or month or year, etc.

Numerology also applies to the date you were born, but also applies to numbers everywhere in our world ~ your address, your phone number, dates when certain events happen...

So if you're still here, everything in our Universe has energy. Everything. Including stars and planets, words, numbers and letters. And how you interpret all of this 'everything' is totally subjective. Totally and completely.

But one path of interpretation of this life is through numerology.

And at this moment, based on the date of my birth, I am in a 2 year, and September is a 2 month. Double 2.

Two is the number of cooperation, collaboration, intuition, feminine energy. Think, pair. As opposed to - for example - the number 1, which is about independence, action, leadership, and masculine energy (there is no good or bad by the way in this, it's all relevant).

The date of one's birth also adds up to a number that is your life path, the energy of what we are here to work through in this lifetime. Mine is a 22. It is one of the "master" numbers. Most folks have a number from 1-9. But there are those of us who have numbers that add up to 11, 22, or 33. Looked at from a slightly negative view, having one of these master numbers as your life path number, well, let's just say there might me a little more pressure to live up to it.

That's how I've been feeling anyway.

And that's the point of this post.

For much of my life, when given the chance to lead, I have done so reluctantly. I have not wanted to stand out, to be separate and apart from the crowd, I have wanted co-workers not employees, I have wanted teammates and to not be the coach. Much of this stems from a feeling of deep loneliness from not feeling like I fit in to any particular group. Feeling like the lone wolf.

Yet again and again, I found myself in a supervisor or manager position, or if I didn't see something where I lived that I was interested in, I would create it, lead it, make it happen.

But I have resisted these tendencies all the same.

Can't someone else lead? I'll just follow along. And those of you that know me or have seen or expereienced some of the things I've done in this life may be surprised to hear all of this.

I have been a reluctant leader. Never quite comfortable. Just wishing someone else would do it.

But, I am a 22.

And it's gentely whispering in my ear that I am here to do some major shit in this lifetime.

I've barely scratched the surface.

And so it is, ironically enough (love the ironic humor of this world) that in my double 2 month, when the energy is all about cooperation and collaboration, that I have realized that I need to be leading something. That I need to blaze a trail in a new direction.

And that I need to do this alone.

I need to honor my vision. And keep it intact. Not watering it down in order to fit in, to belong, or to be part of a group.

And this scares me.

And exhilerates me.

All at the same time.

So here's me. On the cusp of something bigger than I can imagine. Something that is pulling me towards it. Something HUGE. With only glimmers of what it might be. But knowing deep down that it's time. Time to lead. Time to blaze that trail.

Time to shake up the galaxy.


So here's to feeling scared and going for it anyway!

Here's to me, embracing my BIGNESS!


By the way, if you are interested in numerology, here are two excellent sites to get you started. ~ Sally Faubion, Numerologist ~ Creative Numerology by Christine Delorey

And if you ever want to talk numbers, let me know, I love this stuff!!

1 comment:

  1. I think that the wisdom of the 22 path is that a true leader is balanced and moving from a place of wholeness. You are amazing, and I have no doubt that whatever it is the Universe is calling you to do- you will embrace it,infusing it with your wild fearless self! :)