Remember how last week I fretted about not having any alone time to paint because it's spring break?
Turns out I have had plenty of time to paint.
Both alone and with family present. I'm getting better at tuning them out I guess. But shhh, don't tell them that!
So way last fall I started a painting based on a card I had pulled. The card looks something like this, and is a Mayan glyph called Cib [k'eeb]. It also means Owl. I was basically copying the card and not feeling very inspired.
It sat for a while and then I started to change it up a bit. And this time I wanted to just paint, without any predetermined images in mind. Letting in morph into whatever it needed to be.
I still wasn't feeling very inspired. So I put it away and forgot all about it.
Until last week.
When putting some other paintings away I discovered this painting and pulled it out, ready to try again.
Later that day I saw on Facebook (the great tome of knowledge for our times, of course) that it was indeed the day of Cib on some version of the Mayan calendar.
How's that for synchronicity? Don't you just LOVE that shit?
I certainly do.
So here is the progress I made that day. Lots and lots of layers.
And it turns out another bird associated with Cib is Vulture. And I LOVE vulture! She showed up in the painting too.
And see the mermaid tail in the bottom corner?
You know, I don't consciously set out to put these images in my paintings. They show up. If that makes any sense. Often times I'm not even sure why they are appearing. But I know by now to trust the process. Trust my inner voice. And trust that they are all pieces of a very large puzzle that is slowly taking shape. A puzzle that is a mystery in many ways. But when I give in to that unknown, I swear, magic happens.
Here is the final painting.
Another theme in my recent paintings are these ethereal beings that hover about. My inner critic - quite different and more destructive than my inner voice - is telling me I'm doing it on purpose, adding them in, and that I am not REALLY listening to my inner voice, and that aren't we getting a bit boring and repetitive, and blah blah blah, on it goes.
I'd say it's a very fine line. Inner critic? Inner voice?
Or just crazy? Ha.
I don't know about you, but I'm choosing my inner voice, thank you very much. The inner critic has held sway for WAY too long. Many, many years in fact. Time to retire my friend. I've got things to do in this lifetime.
How's the balance in your world? Inner Critic and Inner Voice - how do they dance in your life?